Postpartum Progress reader Amy Perry sent me this email, and agreed to let me share it with you:
Do you, a warrior mom, have a battle hymn? A theme song, if you will? And, do you think your readers may, too? Mine will change from time to time, given what’s new, but the one I’m stuck on right now and love to run to is “Dog Days Are Over” by Florence + The Machine. For, with a little determination, some help from my friends, and a lot of hope, I think the dog days will be over soon.
I loved the way Amy put this and wanted to share it with you so she could get your input. What songs got you through postpartum depression or anxiety or antenatal depression? In the comments, let us know what your Warrior Mom Battle Hymn was or is! I'd love to know too!
A "Battle Hymn" is a great description of what this song was for me during my fight with PPA. "Amazing Grace" by Jars of Clay.
"Amazing grace, I feel you coming up slowly now
Like the sun is risin', heat on my face
Oh love that keeps on shinin', don't let the shadow come
Ya know I gotta feel your healin' rays."
I listened to that song over and over and over…
I ordered the Princess who Saved Herself song after reading your Daily Hope. My girls love it and it totally cracks me up that the princess befriends all her "enemies" and starts a band. It is now how I think of my experience, thanks to you! Here are the lyrics…
There was a castle by a waterfall,
With a pink and purple wall,
And a princess living there.
She had no parents and was all alone,
She got by on her own,
And she liked it pretty well.
'Cause she never wore her socks,
She had a pet snake,
She bought a red (rad?) guitar,
And she ate a whole cake.
And there wasn't anybody there to tell her what to do,
So she did what she wanted to.
Everybody knew the story of the princess who saved herself.
(Princess who saved herself)
(Princess who saved herself)
There was a dragon with a pointy tail,
He was bigger than a whale,
And his breath was terrible.
He scared the princess when he came around,
Tried to burn the castle down,
But she caught him by his tail.
Then she tied him to a tree,
So the dragon couldn't fly,
She told him he was mean,
And it made the dragon cry.
When he finally apologized she offered him some tea,
He accepted it graciously.
Now he visits every weekend with the princess who saved herself.
(Princess who saved herself)
(Princess who saved herself)
(Bridge phone conversation…)
There was a witch who was an evil queen,
She was wrinkled old and green,
And she hated everyone.
She saw the princess in her silver gown,
Put the poison apple down,
Asked her where she bought her clothes.
So they got the witch a dress,
Put some make-up on her face,
They started up a band,
And the dragon played the bass.
Every Saturday they play until their fingertips are sore,
Mostly Math Rock and Cuddle Core.
And they call themselves The Kingdom Of The Princess Who Saved Herself.
(Princess who saved herself)
(Princess who saved herself)
The princess who saved herself.
(Princess who saved herself)
(Princess who saved herself)
Held, by Natalie Grant. I listen to it ALL THE TIME.
A song that i related to was Dear Prudence. I often put on Across the Universe's version and would sing "dear prudence, wont you come out to play." During my dark day of postpartum & mental sick days i felt stuck inside, but it was nice out "the sun is out the sky is blue….".
Talking with my husband during our commute. Music has been very instrumental in getting me through my many struggles particularly the ones since becoming a mother. During the first 6 months if constant baby crying I listened to tons classical not art, Beethoven, etc etc. We sing lots of Christmas music bc it reminds me of an awesome story if a mom & her babe & bc I know all the words. I listen to indie & world music like Fools Gold to dance around w the kiddos. Can't wait to see why everyone's songs are.
Now that DD is 3, my song is "You're the Best Thing I Never Knew I Needed" by Ne-Yo. And we love "The Princess Who Saved Herself."
my song is by Josh Wilson…its called Before the Morning! It's gotten me through many rough days, giving me hope to keep going.
That I Would be Good. by Alanis Morisette
Bluebird by Sara Barreilles.
So here we go, Bluebird
Gather your strength & rise up
Oh let him go, Bluebird
Ready to fly
You & I
Here we go…
Mine is "Your Hands" by JJ Heller. While out shopping with my mom, she was trying her hardest to cheer me up. This song came on the radio, and I sobbed. I looked it up on You tube later that day and sobbed again. For the first time since my diagnosis, my tears meant something different. I can't explain it. I finally realized I wasn't alone.
Here are some lyrics.
I have unanswered prayers
I have trouble I wish wasn't there
And I have asked a thousand ways
That You would take my pain away
That You would take my pain away
I am trying to understand
How to walk this weary land
Make straight the paths that crookedly lie
Oh Lord, before these feet of mine
Oh Lord, before these feet of mine
When my world is shaking
Heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave Your hands
Love this…mine was also Dog Days…and Fighter by Christina Aguilera…
After all of the stealing and cheating you probably think that I hold resentment for you
But uh uh, oh no, you're wrong
Cause if it wasn't for all that you tried to do, I wouldn't know
Just how capable I am to pull through
So I wanna say thank you
Cause it
[Chorus:]
Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
It makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter
Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter
Pink's 18-Wheeler was mine. I especially like this verse:
"Hey, hey, girl! Are you ready for today?
You got your shield and sword?
Cuz its time to play the games
You are beautiful
Even though your not for sure…"
I'd BLAST that entire CD while driving around the lake either alone or with the baby trying to get her to sleep (in which case I wouldn't blast it quite as loud, obviously). Those drives (among other things) saved my life. They were meditative. The speed limit around the lake is like 25 or something crazy slow like that and it would take me about 15-20 minutes to drive around it. I describe my "bad" days as "3-loop" days. Sometimes one loop worked but most time I had to just keep going. Is it crazy that I sometimes look back on those days fondly? Just the parts that worked. In hindsight, I'm impressed with how well I coped on my own before going to therapy. Anyway, the full lyrics:
18 Wheeler
Can't keep me down
Can't keep me down, down
Can't keep me down
I said you can't keep me down
You know you can't keep me down
I said you can't keep me down
Hey, hey, man! What's your problem?
I see you tryin' to hurt me bad
Don't know what you're up against
Maybe you should reconsider
Come up with another plan
Cuz you know I'm not that kinda girl
That'll lay there and let you come first
You can push me out the window
I'll just get back up
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler truck
And I won't give a fuck
You can hang me like a slave
I'll go underground
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but
You can't keep me down, down, down, down
Can't keep me down, down
Can't keep me down, down, down
Can't keep me down, down
Hey, hey, girl! Are you ready for today?
You got your shield and sword?
Cuz its time to play the games
You are beautiful
Even though your not for sure
Don't let him pull you by the scar
You're gonna get your feelings hurt
You can push me out the window
I'll just get back up
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler truck
And I won't give a fuck
You can hang me like a slave
I'll go underground
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but
You can't keep me down, down, down, down
You can push me out the window
I'll just get back up
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler truck
And I won't give a fuck
You can hang me like a slave
I'll go underground
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but
You can't keep me down, down, down, down
Everywhere that I go
There's someone waitin' to chain me
Everything that I say
There's someone tryin' to short-change me
I am only this way
Because of what you have made me
And I'm not gonna break!
You can push me out the window
I'll just get back up
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler truck
And I won't give a fuck
You can hang me like a slave
I'll go underground
You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but
You can't keep me down, down, down, down
As someone coming from a Christian perspective, as I fight PPOCD/anxiety/depression, my battle hymn is "Stronger" by Mandisa and there is also a song called "The Arms That Hold the Universe" by 33 miles.
"If Your Going Through Hell" by Rodney Atkins, "Dream Big" by Ryan Shupe and the Rubberband, "Little Wonders" by Rob Thomas, "Daughter of a King" by Jenny Phillips, "What Faith Can Do" by Kutless, and many more. On days when my anxiety was high I'd tame down and listen to more classical piano or nature sounds like waves or rain falling.
Ru Paul's "Champion". I played this CD non-stop and although it often made me cry, it also made me feel strong.
One dream, the will to fight
And all we can do is laugh
This time, you got it right
And no one can take it back
They tried to keep you down
But there's no denying you're a
Champion, greatest of them all
You're a champion, never gonna fall
You're a champion, still standing tall
You're a champion, and you'll always be a hero
Nobody wins by playing small
Remember who you really are
Fearless and beautiful
A child of a shinin' star
They tried to keep you down
But there's no denying you're a
Champion, greatest of them all
You're a champion, never gonna fall
You're a champion, still standing tall
You're a champion, and you'll always be a hero
And when your stories told and the truth unfolds
They will sing your praises loud
'Cause your stories gold, if the truth be told
With all the children singing
You're a champion, greatest of them all
You're a champion, never gonna fall
You're a champion, still standing tall
You're a champion, and you'll always be a hero
You're a champion, greatest of them all
You're a champion, never gonna fall
You're a champion, still standing tall
You're a champion, and you'll always be a hero
You're a champion
You're a champion
You're a champion
You're a champion and you'll always be a hero
sounds like its definately time for a CD of PND/OCD etc mums. Think it would be great. My songs are from the movie 'Chocolate' quiet and calm, they change my sadness into something gentle and beautiful. And "I can see clearly now the rain has gone…gonna be a bright, bright sunshiney day" as I find a definate link between looking up, out and seeing the world and feeling quite different and positive and not so inside my head and troubles.