Right now I'm supposed to be baking a cake. And finishing the laundry so that I can pack stuff for all four people in my family for our Labor Day weekend trip to the mountains — clothes, video camera, digital camera (does it need batteries?), video player for car ride (oh crap, it's not charged up), son's bday presents (oh crap, I don't have any wrapping paper). And taking a shower so that I can be at my son's school by noon to help with a class project. I have less than two hours to complete all of this and more. But ICANNOTdo that at the moment because I MUST, MUST, MUST write about this:
"I filled out tons of paperwork and wondered why they were asking such vague questions. There was nothing about pregnancy or postpartum depression and I began to wonder if this psychiatrist was the right one for me."
No questions about pregnancy or postpartum depression? Hello?! This is the first hint of trouble.
"The receptionist, and I repeat, receptionist, started asking me questions. Some personal about any sexual, emotional, or physical abuse (no) to what my husband’s name, age, how much caffeine he drank."
How much caffeine her husband drinks? And this has to do with PPD how exactly? And is this receptionist a clinician?If so, she should have said so. If not, she shouldn't be interviewing the patient.
"Next page of paper was all about sex.'When was the last time you had sex?', she asked. I told her that it was the day before I had my son – July 22nd. She made a face and was like 'Wow, that’s been a while. Do you feel like your sex drive has diminished?'
I wanted to say, 'No moron. Again I’m here for postpartum depression, which means that I just had a baby, which means that I couldn’t have sex until I was cleared by my OB, which again, was last Friday.'It was completely pointless and she kept on asking questions like this.
I kept on telling her the same damn thing, 'I just had a baby so…'"
Start heading for the door.
"About 30 minutes had gone by and it was now 1:15pm. The receptionist said that the Dr. should arrive around 2pm and that I was to meet with the male nurse next and then I was free to leave for lunch as long as I was back by 4:30pm.
Um, excuse me? I told her that my appointment was at 12:30pm and that the Dr. was already late since it was 1:15pm. She asked, 'Didn’t anyone tell you that she arrives at 2pm?'No they didn’t tell me that because if they did I would certainly have shown up at 2pm instead of 12:30pm."
What kind of outfit is this? Probably some psychiatrist recommended by a bleeping insurance panel. Now she gets interviewed by another person:
"Then he asked me what year we were in. I felt like I was a patient that had just had a stroke or passed out. I was not seeing a psychiatrist for anything other than postpartum depression, so wouldn’t you have thought that they could have skipped over their 'normal' protocol?
He told me, 'I’m going to tell you three words that I want you to remember and I’ll ask you to repeat them to me later on. They are: flower, penny, tiger. Can you repeat them back to me?'
'Flower, penny, tiger' and I added a little eye roll too.
Next he asked who the President of the USA was and I told him Obama. Then he asked for the Vice President. Oh shit, I couldn’t remember and I figured this wasn’t going to look good …
My blood is boiling. This woman is suffering from postpartum depression. She gets the courage to reach out for help. She's been awaiting this day, hoping she can talk to someone about what's going on with her, even though she's scared out of her wits. She wasn't sent there because she's psychotic. She wasn't sent there because she has dementia. I'm seriously practically hyperventilating.
"The Dr. came in [at 3:30 for a 12:30 appointment, I might add] and looked like she belonged somewhere else, definitely not in charge of these patients. She spent five, maybe ten minutes with me and that was it …"
Five minutes at the first appointment. Wow. Run, Jane, run for your life.
To make a long story short, the doctor then whips out the prescription pad for a couple of medications and tells her to come back in a week for a med check and be prepared to wait again. Jane decides never to go back. Who could blame her?
"Why is it so hard to find good help for postpartum depression? Why did I just waste 4 hours of my time at that psychiatrist’s office and all she wanted to do was medicate me? She didn’t even ask me questions about how I was feeling. The day was such a let-down."
Good question Jane. It shouldn't be so hard.
Jane's story is a lesson for every new mom reaching out for help. You must reach out for help, let's get that straight. But you must also know that if any of the things that happened to Jane happen to you, leave.
There ARE people who are specialists.Here is what good therapists and psychiatrists and social workers will do:
- They will operate their offices professionally.
- They will listen very carefully to you and what you are going through.
- They will do what they can to make you feel comfortable and they will welcome questions and concerns.
- They will ask you questions about when you had your baby, how much support you have, how much sleep you are getting, how breastfeeding is going if you are in fact breastfeeding, what kind of symptoms you are having (guilt, sadness, difficulty concentrating, etc.), how you are feeling about being a mom, whether you are having scary thoughts, how well you are eating, whether you have contemplated suicide, etc.
- They will talk to you specifically about postpartum depression and the various methods of treatment (not just medication), and will talk to you about the medication should you choose to take it, including potential side effects.
This psychiatrist, whoever she was, is NOT one of those people.
There is no excuse for what Jane went through. It is awonderful thingthat she decided to keep reaching out for treatment and found someone better, rather than just quitting right then and there. Others, weighted down by the heavy misery of PPD, might have just given up.
Please, my dear readers and clinican friends, speak up on this one. Now off to that shower …
Thank you for this blog! I had a similar issue with a counsler, she found out I didn't have her beliefs and was totally put off by it. I can't believe these people are allowed to deal with anyone especially when we are dealing with such a trying time!
Enjoy your weekend!
Oh, goodness….where to begin. I can go on and on but don't want to hog up the space so I'll just say that this is another example of how good help for PPD is so hard to find. It should be a requirement for ALL mental health practitioners–and medical health practitioners, for that matter–to have basic training in PPD. They mustn't be allowed to practice without that knowledge. To make a patient wait 3 hours, only to stay there for a few minutes and then randomly prescribe meds (without even knowing enough about the patient before doing so?!?). C'mon. Totally UNACCEPTABLE. I mean, it's not like the psychiatrist was out there delivering a baby or something like that, and even when that happens, the staff usually gives waiting patients the heads up. Sounds like this psychiatrist has her own set of issues but when running a practice, she has to learn to put her patients FIRST.
Oh.My.GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh.My.GOD!
Yeah,um, I'm … wow.
Huh?
I'm hyperventilating right along with you.
So let's say jane went to a doctor for a heart condition.
The cardiologist couldn't see her that day but the GP could. So Jane sees the GP and leaves with a script for insulin injections.
I'd say that analogy is on par with what happened here. Idiot doctor didn't listen to her, she wasn't referred to a knowledgeable professional. I don't BLAME her for not going back.
I knew many of you would be horrified. Even though it's Labor Day weekend I'm hoping to hear from doctors and counselors on this as well. There's just no excuse.
This is one of the worse cases of lack of compassion, on the part of a would professional and HER staff( IT WAS A SHE RIGHT!) That a person, any person, would ask questions, of this kind ,is nuts. I have had all kinds of care, but I have never be asked these things. I diffently would have walked out. I would also file a report against this person , with the state board(medical) to make it known that this occured. Good luck to Jane, I hope that she gets the best of care now and in the future!
That is ridiculous! I remember 8 weeks after my first child was born (seven yrs ago), I went in for my checkup and told the nurse something was wrong with me, that I couldn't stop sobbing and wondered if there was a hotline I could call. She asked me if I wanted to hurt my baby. When I said no, she said I didn't need a hotline and should just read some parenting magazines. AGGGHHHHH!!!! I was hoping this kind of stuff was fading into the dark ages, but apparently not. There absolutely is good help out there. If you know others going through PPD, ask them who they see – or ask your OBGYN, or search online to see if any local media have done stories on PPD and featured local experts. She deserves to have a much better experience! Thanks for sharing.
Are you serious? Those questions were the same ones asked of my 76 year old mom for dementia!! How can people be so heartless and clueless. It is hard enough for someone to reach out for help, let alone deal with this cr*p. Ugh. Glad we can reach out to her!!
Thank you for this article.
Only found your site today but think ill be visiting more often! 🙂
Love your writing style.
Marcia xxx
Wow…Amazing story! Jane needed THAT appointment like a hole in the head! Yikes! RUN,Jane,RUN!! i too had an awful experience and have learned so much since 1987.
Jane should have her progesterone levels tested and try bioidentical progesterone to help her level out her post partum state. Also, Omega 3 fatty acids are critical to the mental health of all women after giving birth but especially PPD. The baby demands a HUGE amount of this from the mother for brain development in utero. Omega 3 Fatty Acids have a profound link to post partum depression! So add plenty of FRESH flax oil, walnuts and salmon to your diet and………Tell all your mom friends! This works!
Melba Clark San Marcos, CA http://www.paradisepotions.com
This is absolutely outrageous, and complete unacceptable and maddening. Seriously. What a JOKE. I cannot believe she was left to wait so long and shown not one IOTA of compassion. Ridiculous.
I'm a hospital social worker, and Kim is right on the money – we ask those very questions (where are you? what year is it? repeat the following three items after me…, etc.) to patients who may be suffering from dementia, or to determine how cognitively functional a patient is. Giving Jane that test was way out of line.
It seems that there was no attention paid to her on an individual basis, and that all patients are expected to go through the same tests and set of questions, no matter what their reason is for seeking treatment. That, in itself, is completely unprofessional and certainly not patient-focused care.
As a part of my job, I sometimes speak with new mothers in our obstetrics unit, and some of the first questions that we ask about are in regards to social support, how their birth experience went, how they are feeling about their new baby and the challenges ahead, are there any particular stressors (financial, family problems, etc.) that may impact them as they face this crazy new phase in their lives. We also talk about warning signs for PPD and encourage them to seek treatment right away if they suspect something is not right.
I so wish that someone would have asked Jane those simple questions prior to just slapping a bunch of irrelevant questions and tests on her without even LISTENING TO HER STORY.
I think it's great that Jane is putting her story out there, and that you are shedding some light on it as well. Unfortunately, this kind of thing is probably happening all over the place, and women need to know they shouldn't stand for it. There is GOOD help out there – it just stinks that it can be hard so hard to find at times.
From a clinicians point of view:
Over the years my motto has become one of "It doesn't take as much effort to become a therapist as it takes to be a good one." Clincians should:
Get good supervision from mentors and stay conneted to others in this specialized field. They should do their research, stay current and most of all be compassionate, reserve judgement, and be good people!
I am not suprised, in the least, by her story as unfortunate as it is. I have been on both sides of the couch. I became a therapist and then I became a survivor of PPD. And it took me several BAD experiences before I had a good one.
My warmest wishes to anyone seeking GOOD help. It is out there.
Meeka Centimano, LSCSW http://www.kansasppd.org
It is amazing to me that Jane has found the courage and strength required to even tell this story. I received some horrendous care at the hands of "doctors" after having my daughter and was simply too ill to even speak out about it. I have never even found the courage to complain about the treatment received at the hospital. Jane, you are a strong, brave and intelligent woman! There is light after PPD and you will find it.
Thanks so much Katherine for sharing her story. It's important that women know that as much as doctors have authority, we are their customers and deserve to be treated with respect and care. You can and should stand up for yourself. If you cannot, take someone with you who can look out for your rights.
Paula Mitchell-Bentley
I too am shocked to hear about the receptionist asking such personal questions and about the ridiculous wait Jane had to experience. However, I must be totally honest and disagree wholeheartedly with the criticism being heaped upon the doctor for asking the, ‘’What year are we in? What is the President’s name type of questions…’’ – such questions are not only for dementia patients. In fact, what they are, are questions to see how connected one is to reality and they, from personal experience, are very relevant and necessary for anyone seeing a psychiatrist, including postpartum women.
Sure Jane went in thinking she had postpartum depression, but that doesn't mean that is what she is/was actually suffering from. I say this because I too was referred to a psychiatrist for ‘’postpartum depression.’’ In my case, it was the amount of time and difficulty I had in answering those very same questions that first tipped off my psychiatrist to the fact that there was a little more than postpartum depression going on with me. That is to say, what I was actually suffering from was postpartum psychosis (postpartum depression with psychotic features) – a condition that does cause a person to experience a break with reality and would impede a person from answering the ‘’dementia questions.’’
So I guess what I am trying to say here is that I would definitely not put having to wait 3 hours for a doctor, being asked nosy questions by a receptionist and being asked, ‘’what year are we in…’’ questions all in the same category of unprofessional conduct. The first two are definitely unprofessional. But the last is not only pertinent but a sign of a physician trying to rule out potentially dangerous conditions – something I think is commendable, not to mention something I credit with having played a role in saving my life.
As a newly licensed psychotherapit I can attest to the fact that more often than not clinicians are not educated about postpartum mood disorders, what the symptoms are or how to treat them.
That being said, the responsibility is on the clinician to research, seek out supervision, and find resources for the population and issues they wish to treat. It is true that sometimes therapists and psychiatrists ask questions that may not seem relevant to their clients, but it is important to do so in a compassionate and respectful way if the cliniican believes the questions are necessary.
I am sorry for Jane's incredibly hurtful experience and for all the others who have been harmed by health professionals. Though it is difficult to do when you feel vulnerable, I want to encourage the moms out there to be consumers. Seeking help is difficult, but you usually know when you've been seen and heard so if you don't feel that way, you haven't found the right clinician yet. I truly wish it wasn't trial an error, but that just seems to be the case.
The more people bravely share there experiences, the less women will have to go it alone and the more information and resources they will have when they do seek help.
Be Well,
Shana J. Pittman, LPC
Wow, where to begin… Sad to say, I am not very surprised.
After my wife got PPD we got a pretty harsh crash course in dealing with the medical profession. I won't go into the details, but the Alberta medical system is pretty busted up. For us, when we initially tried to get her help we were told that we could wait 8 months for someone (I am not kidding) or go to emergency. There was no middle ground available. Once we did get someone to at least perscribe medicine, we felt trapped with them and it was not a healthy relationship. For quite a while, I went with her to every appointment (including therapists and psychiatrists) as sort of an "independant councel". The therapists didn't like it, but it gave us some peace of mind. All I can say is that if I could have gotten us in to another doctor I would have in a heartbeat.
With depression, it is important to remember that the doctor really has to take the time (and posess the skill) to understand you. If they don't "get you" and understand PPD, they will not be as effective (and this may even lead to harm). Basically, like any doctor, they need to take the time to look at the issues. You wouldn't let a doctor treat a broken leg if they didn't even look at it and your mental health is similar. If you don't feel comfortable with the doctor and feel like you can talk to them and they will listen, then you should probably look for a better one. If the doctor is making you go through all this and then just quickly writing a persctiption, the chances are that they are not the doctor that you want helping you through this. I know that it is horribly tough, but it sounds like time to find a better doctor. Of course one of the worst things with this is that of course if you are suffering from PPD, the last thing that you want to do is to delay treatment and go through the process of starting over again.
In the end, always remember that in the end, it is your health and you hold more power than you may believe. You have the right to ask questions and you have the right to look elsewhere for help. If like us, you feel that you have limited options, you could stay with your doctor until you can get an appointment with a better doctor.
Also, try getting hold of some sort of local support group and asking them for suggestions. I know that there was a local group here (familiesmatter.ca) that understood postpartum and was able to suggest better resources and doctors who specialized in this.
I checked with Massachusetts General Hospital on this claim, and was told there is no data to support the use of progesterone; in fact, they say it may increase the intensity of depressive symptoms. So I would be careful of this. — Katherine